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Infidelity 101: The Crisis Phase
“If you really want to gut a relationship, tear out the very heart of it, infidelity is a sure bet.” —Esther Perel Few things knock a relationship off balance as dramatically as the revelation of cheating. Esther Perel, relational sorceress and...
The Six Books You NEED in your Home Library for Healthy Relationships + Sex
As a couples and sex therapist, there are several books I refer back to constantly with my clients, and for good reason: they each offer wisdom in the form of easily-accessible academic research and/or theoretical assumptions and guidance based on...
“Do The Thing”: A Lesson on Follow Through—and Why It Matters
Trust is a fascinating dynamic in relationships. It is foundational, ever-changing, nuanced, and sometimes heartbreaking. For some, there are deep wounds from the past that may take a lifetime to heal. For others, trust issues might arise on a...
I’m Kimberly Sharky
AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist and Licensed Marital and Family Therapist
I offer relationship & sex coaching in my New York City office & Worldwide via Zoom
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Enliven Your Love: The Parenthood Edition
Enliven Your Love: Post-Pandemic Reset Edition
Let’s be honest—none of us receive an education in the art of passionate, fulfilling relationships. And then a pandemic hit and we have all experienced - and are still experiencing - massive shifts in every aspect of our lives.
The Enliven Your Love Programs are your tickets to reconnecting with yourself, your partner, and your relationship.
When Sex Gets Stale: The Surprising Key to Expanding Your Sexual Repertoire
“My love for him is as strong as ever, but our sexual connection is another story.” “She’s my wife, the mother of our children. I just can’t imagine objectifying her the way I can with strangers I pass on the street.” “If I were to share what I...
Should We Live Together? The Key to Cohabitation Contentment
I often ask couples I work with to tell me their love story. Their narrative about how they met, fell for each other, and made a series of decisions that led to where they are now tells me a lot about their relationship and their mindset. As they...
Top Tips for a Beach Body: A Quick Guide to Building Body Confidence
It’s that time of year again! With Chicago beaches opening for the season this Friday, having the ol’ bod beach-ready is at the top of everyone’s list. Some quick tips for making sure you’re all set: Look down, check the mirror, give a pinch or...
The Anxiety-Erection Connection: What Young Men Need to Know About Their Penises
A huge part of our job as relationship and sex therapists, it seems, is to actively and eagerly dispel myths about “healthy” sexuality, sexual functioning, and relational well-being. This week’s topic tackles a widespread and wildly untrue myth...
Your Brain in Love: Do Men and Women Really Think Differently?
You: “I planned a few things for us to do Saturday.” Partner: “Can’t we just be spontaneous this weekend?” You: “What do you want to do for dinner?” Partner: “I hadn’t thought about that yet.” You: “How about we grab a drink before Mom’s party?”...
Reflections on Marriage: Part One
“Nobody tells you how long marriage is. When you fall in love, when you have fun with somebody, when you enjoy the way they see the world, nobody ever says, ‘This person will change. And so you will be married to two, three, four, five or 10 people...
A Must-know Anatomy Lesson: The Clitoris
A simple piece of advice for women—or those who have sex with women—about enhancing their sexual pleasure: Get to know the clitoris. I mean really get to know it. After all, it’s the only part of the female body that exists purely for your...
This (Basically) Just In: Women’s Sexuality Different from Men’s
“Prior to the mid to late 1990s, women’s and men’s sexual response were mostly viewed as complementary, as two sides of the same coin. As such, multiple perspectives on women’s sexuality, including models of sexual response, the nature of sexual...
Two paths toward desire
Did you know there are two different types of desire, and both, yes, BOTH, are completely normal and healthy? Thanks to amazing researchers like Emily Nagoski, Ph.D., author of the absolute BEST book on human sexuality (Come As You Are: The...
When Your Low is Too Low: Three Rules for Fighting Fair
You've heard it before: Every relationship has its highs and lows. Love is a roller coaster. Sure, we have to learn to navigate the natural ups and downs of a relationship; these are essential skills for building resilience as a healthy couple. I...
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