There are many things about new relationships that are just so much fun. There’s the surprise of getting to know someone new, the extra attention that goes into creative dates and romantic moments, and, of course, flirting—those subtle, cutesy, often unspoken ways that you let each other know “I like you” or “I think you’re sexy.” Over time, we tend to assume that our partner already knows these things, so the urge to send little reminders (like a wink from across the room or a for-no-reason kiss) often falls by the wayside. But the fun of flirting doesn’t have to end just because you’re already committed! When I encourage couples I work with to incorporate flirtation back into their relationship, they often look bewildered. “How do we do that?!” they ask. What once felt so natural now seems like a daunting task. But it doesn’t have to. Here are a few easy ways to incorporate flirtation back into your relationship—no matter how long you’ve been together.

1. Touch. A spontaneous squeeze of your partner’s hand under the table, a kiss on her shoulder as you watch TV, or a squeeze of his butt as the elevator doors close send a strong and lasting message.

2. Write. If you leave before your partner wakes up, stick a post-it note on the coffee maker with a simple “I love you.” If your spouse is going on a business trip, slip a romantic card into her suitcase for a sweet surprise when she arrives. Even a subtle winky face drawn on a fogged-up mirror can mean so much when your partner spots it while brushing his teeth.

3. Text. A quick “I’m thinking of you” or “Remember how much fun we had last night?” will put a smile on your partner’s face even on the dullest of workdays. Nervous about others peeking your sexy texts? Give a few emojis a secret meaning and text them to each other sporadically. You’ll be the only two who know that zebra mean “I love you,” and pineapple means “I can’t wait to get you naked.”

4. Gift. Presents don’t have to be reserved for special occasions—and they don’t have to cost much to pack a big meaning. Look out for your partner’s favorite candy bar at the grocery store or pick up a few sunflowers at that market you pass on the way home.

5. Talk. Noticing that your partner looks extra hot as he steps out of the shower? Speak up! Does it feel good when she snuggles closer to you in bed? Let her know! At the start of your relationship, statements like “I have fun with you” or “I like looking at you” don’t feel out of place—and they can be just as connecting now.

These little flirtations don’t take long or use much energy, but as they build up over time, they can completely transform your connection and reinvigorate that new-relationship spark.

Happy flirting!